Ice Cream and Wine — Creative Writing Humor Contest

I heard from Charmin Dahl who told me about Ben & Jerry’s Do Us A Flavor Contest.  It was featured on Good Morning America Thursday morning (October 5th).  They recognized five finalists.  Their First Place entry:  Puttin’ on a Ritz would consist of vanilla ice cream, caramel and Ritz crackers.

Charmin suggested that this could be a good starter for a Humor Power Contest.  And she’s right.  We’re expanding the theme to include not only names of imaginary ice creams but also wines.  The challenge is to exercise your creativity and come up with something funny that might include a punchline.  The entries will be “just for the fun of it” and probably would never be submitted to a real ice cream company or winery.  Our contest is not sponsored by any ice cream or wine company.

Here are some examples to get jump-start your thinking. 

ICE CREAM

Haagen Noggin — An eggnog flavored delight in the tradition of the upper-mid-west.  Best enjoyed while wearing a helmet with horns.

Sven & Cherries — A Viking favorite.  Scandinavian sweet cream blended with crisp Rainier cherries. 

Eyes Scream — An exciting new flavor made with five varieties of fresh onions.  Mouth watering.  Eye watering.

Election Dazs  — Contains an unusual variety of fruits and nuts.  Consume it quickly before you start to wonder why you bought it.  The recipe is changed every four to eight years.  This product will be advertised by recorded phone messages during your dinner.

Buffalo Chip Surprise — The size and shape of these gourmet chips are sure to excite.  The surprise is that they LOOK just like chocolate.  Not sold in pints because the chips are larger than the containers.

Scream de Mint — Will literally take your breath away.  Part of the profits will be used to plant a tree in your memory.

WINES

Cabernet au Lait — An exciting new white wine from Wisconsin.  Smooth with a creamy, phlegmatic aftertaste.

Whipple — An affordable wine made from grapes squeezed by curious shoppers.  Charmin’s favorite.

The Grapes of Bath — A sister of bathtub gin.  A fine wine, slightly cloudy but clean, bubbly, with a hint of salt.

Wine Fooler — Tastes like wine, but surprise!  No grapes, no alcohol.  Chemistry for better living.

Albino Rhino — A spearmint flavored white wine served only at Gentlemen’s clubs.

THE CONTEST

1.  Put on your thinking cap. 
2.  Jot down some ideas.  Let them sit for a day or two.  Write.  Rewrite.
3.  Stimulate your creativity while enjoying your favorite ice cream or wine.
4.  Bounce your ideas around with a humor buddy.
5.  Select your best lines and submit them to HumorPowerTips@aol.com by November 15.
6.  The results of the contest will be posted by the end of the month.
7.  It’s a contest just for the fun of it.  Take the challenge and see what you can come up with