Joke Contest — Favorite Foods

Here are the winners from our Favorite Foods Contest. 

We had lots of great submissions this month.

We announce new Joke Contests mid-month.

Our Cartoon Caption Contests are announced on the first of the month.

And now for our top lines:


Polygraph test administrators like Whoppers.
     Gary Bachman, Hagerstown, Maryland, USA.


Interrogation officers like grilled sandwiches
     Arun Ramkumar, Chennai, India.


Spyware programmers like cookies.
     Mike Truland, Fort Mill, South Carolina, USA

HONORABLE MENTION (in random order)

Windows users are learning to like apples.
Contortionists like pretzels.  
Workers like Paydays.
Astronomers like Milky Way bars.
Eskimos prefer Snow Cones.
Brothers of grooms at wedding receptions in Paris make French Toasts.
Veterinarians like Hush Puppies.
Men of the cloth prefer Angel Food Cake.
Military personnel strive for scrambled eggs on their hats.
Shoemakers love cobbler.
Smokers wish they loved cold turkey.
Jewelers love carrots.
Rock N Rollers love Meatloaf.
Mathematicians love pie.
Lumberjacks love chops.
Drummers love beets.
Numismatics love penne and mints.
Truck drivers love Big Macs.
Fishermen love Whoppers.
Safe robbers love crackers.
Eskimoes love chili.
Limo drivers love rolls.
Poker players love chips.
Lawyers like tortes.
Carpenters like pound cake.
Twister players like pretzels.
Liberals like leftovers.
People in small houses like cottage cheese.
Humorists like wry bread.
Mr Royce likes rolls.
John Wayne likes True Grits.
Major league baseball hitters like batter.
Vacillating people like waffles.
Pacifists like peace and carrots.
Romans likes Caesar salad.
English teachers like alphabet soup.
Television performers like couch potatoes.
Sailors like Submarine sandwiches.
Crime fighters like Hero sandwiches.
Doctors dont like apples…they’re bad for business.
Electricians can’t resist Currants.
Cartoonists love Peanuts.
Racers like fast food.
Recovering alcoholics hate cold turkey.
Colonels love chickens.
Gamblers love big steaks.
Hunters like poached eggs.
Encrypters like scrambled eggs.
Newyorkers love big apples.
Stage actors love Ham.
Gardeners love Gummi worms.
Sky divers hate summer squash.
Pet Shop owners love Hushed Puppies.
State police love expresso.
Cheney hunting buddies better like duck.
Singles love dates.
Santa must have a jelly belly.
Bankers like lots of bread.
Herb loves Rosemary.
Big carrots are a girl’s best friend.
Burger King loves Dairy Queen and they live in a White Castle.
Priests have a prayer for lettuce.
Golfers like tea time.
Girl Scouts have grown out of brownies.
TV writers would like a popular cereal.
The sound effects crew eats up canned food.
Boy Scouts like Thai Food…KNOT!
Comedians love cracked crab.
Seismologists love Milk Shakes.
Government spies love tap water.
Train drivers like Subway.
Professors like Teacher’s whiskey.
Train conductors like sardines.
Door to door salesmen love Ding Dongs.
Psychologists love Nutter Butters.
Superstitious people love Lucky Charms.
Magicians love Trix.
The Judges favorite was Life.
Female wresters love Jello.
Jugglers avoid Butterfingers.
Cowgirls love Jolly Ranchers.
Pop stars love Poptarts.
Masochists desire a good Dream Whip.
Pick pockets prefer finger foods.
Playboys love fresh tarts.
DA’s love dishing out just desserts.
Teachers love smarties and don’t like Dum Dums.
TV addicts love cereals.
Comedians enjoy a good Roast.
Boxers love battered opponents.
Swimmers love lifesavers.
Hipsters love a square meal.
Midwives love a meal that’s home delivered.
Bus drivers love a Double Decker.
Karate Masters love their chops.
Mensa members love brains.
Politicians gag on humble pie.
Bad Spellers Love W&Ws.
Climbers love a Mountain Bar.
Charlie Brown loves York’s Peppermint Patty.
Swimmers love a dip.
Legislators like pork.
Computer hackers like cookies, and love sharing them with unsuspecting people.
Chess players like Chex cereal.
Cowboys like Trail Mix.
Everyone on Gilligan’s Island liked Ginger.
Weightlifters like beefcake and mussels.
Amateur radio operators like ham.
Physicists into the laws of motion like fig newtons.
Auto mechanics like V8 juice.
Bolsheviks didn’t like White Russians.
Dracula likes to have a Bloody Mary.
On their days off bakers don’t like bacon.