Finding Your Signature Story
Professional speakers who are at the top of their game are often known for their “signature stories.” These are original, compelling stories on which reputations are built.
Signature stories are usually funny. Often they are VERY funny. But in spite of the power of humor, a signature story of the highest level must have more than just funny lines. And they need more than a significant message.
The art of improv comedy teaches us that good scene work is
centered around characters, relationships and objectives. So it is
with great stories in speaking. In a great story the message is
built around drama, challenges or obstacles, relationships, strong
characters.
A story which is relatively simple and predictable is less likely
to strike it rich as a signature story. And a story which belongs
to someone else will never make YOU famous. You want to work for
the original and compelling stories which have substantial real
life drama. A bad relationship turned into a good relationship. A
life-and-death situation survived. A dramatic or embarrassing
situation coped with. A story with a strong colorful character
which teaches a great life lesson.
Here is a story which I really like. It’s a true life experience.
But it lacks nearly all the critical elements of a GREAT story. So
I rarely use it:
I was waiting at a red traffic light and my mind was wandering.
The car to my left started to go, so I automatically figured the
light was green and I started to go. Then I looked up and saw the
light was still red. The car next to me was turning left on a
green arrow. So I slammed on my brakes. Unfortunately, the car
behind me, seeing that I was going, started to go. And the driver,
not expecting me to stop suddenly, crashed into the back of my car.
A pair of assumptions caused an accident. I assumed that the
person on my left was going the same place I was…and he wasn’t.
My assumption was wrong. The driver behind me assumed that I knew what I was doing…I didn’t. He was wrong. We often make assumptions in life that lead us down the wrong path. We assume that what is right for someone else is right for us, when it may not be. And we assume that someone else knows what they’re doing or possesses the truth, and sometimes they don’t. We need to be awake and clear thinking in our choices and judgments or life will teach us hard lessons.
A good story. Good lessons. The lessons could probably be
expressed in a hundred different ways. But it’s not a great story.
There is little humor. There is no drama. There are no colorful
characters. There are no substantial relationship situations.
There are no challenges or obstacles. It’s a simple story and
some may say it’s predictable.
But finding a great signature story is easier said than done. It
may take years of searching and then experimenting from the
platform until the right story clicks for you. My recommendation
is that you focus on your life’s experiences and primarily look for
situations which have obstacles to overcome, relationship problems,
and lessons learned. Your story doesn’t need to be as significant
as surviving a hostage situation or a plane crash. Life’s everyday
problems with interpersonal relationships can be just as dramatic.
You just need to tune in to your experiences so that you can
capture the magical story and put it into your speech.
August 23rd, 2008 at 5:41 am
[...] Kinde reflects on the difficult task of finding your signature story. A story which is relatively simple and predictable is less likely to strike it rich as a [...]
August 23rd, 2008 at 8:48 pm
some good tips, i’ve been trying to figure out what my signature story is for a while now and like you said – easier said than done! that’s for sure
September 14th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
Ya’ can “Adopt” someone else’s story — as Your Own !
“Subjectivise it.” Change time and / or place. Even the
who — what — and / or why — as needed / logical. ( And , if
that is too awkward or irritating / problematical == you
can make it a “Friend” or “Relative.” ) Why not ?
And if there are “embarrasing Negatives” involved —
you can go the Other Direction : “Generic” the story
— make it “Vague” and Impersonal. Or get Permission of person(s) involved. Remember: Being “Involved” / part of YOUR
Story is “stronger” / Richer than Observing it — or (gulp )
Reading or Hearing about it. If possible : Put Yourself
in the Picture !
September 15th, 2008 at 7:49 am
I’m in Toastmasters. I have a signature story. I didn’t pick it, others did. I am a story teller (different slightly from a speaker). I ALWAYS use humor, it’s me. When ever I am at a social gathering, people say Hey tell that one that I like. No matter how many times I’ve told it, I still get asked. But I would like to take your advice and try to find one myself – for me.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Hi Sol,
I’d be very careful when “adapting” someone’s story as your own. In the world of professional speaking, “borrowing” someone’s signature story as your own is frowned upon. Just changing some elements of the story doesn’t necessarily make it yours. I find that someone else’s story can be a good reminder of “that’s like the time when something happened to me.” It can help me find my own story. The danger of using something that is close to someone else’s story is that, first, you’re using their property, and second, it can affect your credibility when people realize that you’re using “borrowed” material.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:45 pm
Hi Lola,
Yes. Audiences and listeners are a good measure of our best stories. Often, our best signature stories evolve because of feedback from others telling us that it is a great story that touches and moves them.