Joke Contest Results — Classic TV Updated

Here are the results from our April contest — Classic TV Updated.  The top three entries were selected by a panel of eight judges (speakers and improv players).

New Joke Contests are announced on the first of the month (alternating months).

New Cartoon Caption Contests are announced on the first of the month (alternating months).  The next caption contest is May 1, 2011.

** FIRST PLACE **

Starshrek–With a five year mission to go where no ogre has gone before.
     Marty Bernstein, Oak Park, Illinois

** SECOND PLACE **

Southern Exposure–Young doctor does his internship in a nudist camp.
     Gerald Fleischmann, Fountain Valley, California

** THIRD PLACE **

Who Wants To Be A Billionaire
     D. Allen, Crofton, Maryland

HONORABLE MENTION (in random order)

  – M*U*S*H–A raucous compilation of the funniest hijinks that happened during the Korean War.
  – Howdy Dooit–In this detective thriller, our hero pulls all the strings.
  – The Paper Chaise–Follow the whirlwind lives of Origami students.
  – The Mild Mild West–This private investigator team prefers to beat their villains with time outs and tough love.
  – Leave it to the Beverly Hill St. Blues–The logical result of program fusion.
  – The Frying Nun–Gourmets genuflect over the convent’s cookery.
  – Murder She Rote–Weekly original mystery stories that totally engross the viewer while following the same, stodgy formula.
  – Bananza–Life with a cowboy family on a tropical plantation.
  – Watch Mr. Blizzard–He just loves to snow the kids with science.
  – Have Gum, Will Travel–It’s BlackJack for this gunslinger, Palate-in.
  – They Call Me MISTER Rogers–Mild-mannered nice guy brings law and order to a really tough neighborhood.
  – The Frying Nun–Grounded for buzzing the convent, our heroine soars to new heights as a culinary convert.
  – S*M*A*S*H – Horrific surgical accidents caught on film.
  – The Ozzie Divorced Harriet and Married Sharon Show–Proving once again that there is no perfect family.
  – Welcome Back Carter–Our greatest living ex-president re-enters the presidential race on the Habitat for Humanity platform.
  – Green Acres–Follow the adventures of medicinal marijuana growers.
  – The Waltons–Sam Walton rises from the grave to throw out all foreign-made Wal-Mart products.
  – Gilligan’s Survivor Island–Tempers run high as America’s favorite castaways plot and conspire against each other.
  – Three’s Company–A guy lives with three females.  So What?
  – The Gong Show Idol–No annoying voting, just a lot of gong banging
  – The Honeymooners on Gilligan’s Island–The Royal misadventures of Prince William and Kate.
  – The Sopranos–An American Idol spinoff for opera singers only.
  – Rat Patrol–Adorable cartoon rodents live and love beneath the streets of New York City.
  – Fantasy Island–A comedy where people think they can afford to pay for gas in their vehicle.
  – Howahya  Five-O: A group of Friends who loved being 30 and then 40 somethings, now deal with the reality of 50 staring them in the face. Sponsored by Viagra, Activa and Lipitor.
  – Prince of  Dead-Air–The biographical story about the VP of Cellular service for AT&T and his comical attempts to give better cellular coverage.
  – Saturday Night Live–In real time, on your Google Machine.
  – I Team–Creating and exploring new worlds with Apple Products.
  – My Three Sons–Back Home Again.
  – The ADD Couple
  – Get Smartphone
  – Facebook The Nation
  – Make Room for Diddy
  – Leave it to Boehner
  – My Eight Sons–Starring Kate Gosselin.
  – The Muensters–Updated, but still cheesy.
  – Master Ed–About a horse who is a martial arts teacher.
  – The Bob Oldhart Show
  – Chocolate CHiPS–Starring Mrs. Fields.
  – Miami Vise Grips–A series about criminal handymen.
  – Don Knotts Landing–Celebrating two classic shows.
  – Doobie Houser, not MD
  – All My Grandchildren
  – Live Broadcast of the U.S. Congress, formerly The Twilight Zone.
  – 30 Rock From The Sun
  – Leave It To Tweeter
  – I’ve Got Victoria’s Secret
  – What’s My Link?
  – Wonder Woman–Juggling Family & Career and Still Looking Good.
  – The Cosby Show–Now takes place in an old folks home.