Joke Contest Results — Creative Business

It’s time for the results of our December Joke Contest.  The theme for the contest is Creative Business.  The challenge was to combine two unlikely businesses under the same roof and come up with a name for the new business. 

New Joke Contests are announced on the first of the month.

Here are the top lines for the December contest.


Security Devices.  Bird Habitats.  Specialty Cheese:  Locks Nests Muenster.
     Scott Tredwell, Advance, North Carolina


Relocation Specialists and a Department Store:  Moving Target.
     Tom Nee, Oak Lawn, Illinois


Attorney and Personal Organizer:  Law & Order
     Melanie White, Rowlett, Texas

HONORABLE MENTION (in random order)

  – Hi-tech Company and Furniture Manufacturer:  The Rattan Apple.
  – Duck Farming and Cheap Medical Clinic:  T.J. Quacks.
  – Farm Building Construction and Baby Nursery Decorating:  Barns and Mobiles.
  – Oil Drum Storage for Small Spaces:  Stacker Barrel.
  – Law Firm and Bird Sanctuary:  Legal Eagles.
  – Moving Company and Publicity Agents:  U-Haul  of  Fame.
  – Recycle Services and Old Light Bulbs:  Blew Light Special.
  – Gentlemen’s Club and T-Shirt Shop: Tease T’s.
  – Jewish Deli Drive-thru:  Lox in a Box.
  – Church, Mexican beer, Charity, and Health insurance a la Dr. Seuss:  One Cross – Two Cross – Red Cross – Blue Cross.
  – Charitable Giving and Appliances:  Generous Electric.
  – Optometry, Gas, and Tax Filing: Eye Shell Returns.
  – Mattresses and anesthetics: Sleep Numb-er.
  – Hardware and Knife Sharpening:  Hone Depot.
  – Deep Discounts and Milk Shakes:  Frostco.
  – Printers and Laxatives: Epson Salts.
  – Gasoline and Honey: Esso Bee.
  – Night Guards and Blackjack Dealers: Sentry 21.
  – Piracy and Bedding: Booty Rest.
  – Banking and Air Travel: Chase Virgin.
  – Motel and Shoe Store: Ramada Zapata.
  – Mexican Food and Accounts Receivable:  Taco Bills.
  – Speed Dating and Electronics Store: Best Guy.
  – Coffins Made to Order and Tobacco Sales:  Coughing Coffins.
  – Hairdresser and Travel Agent:  Hair n There.
  – Tree Trimming and Dog Grooming:  Tall Tails.
  – Shoe Repair and House of Worship:  Sole Savers.
  – A Leaning Tower and a Pizza Shop: A  Pisa Pizza.
  – Butter Manufacturer and Tanning Salon:  Churn & Burn.
  – Health Food Store and Hearing Aid Manufacturer:  Soy What?
  – Bail Bondsman and Novelty Shop:  ConFound It.
  – Writer Supplies and Specialty Truck Parts: Monsters Ink.
  – Plant Nursery and Restaurant:  Garden of Eating.
  – Oats Farmer and Insurance Seller:  Quaker State Farm.
  – Oats Farmer and Computer Manufacture:  Quaker Technology.
  – Snack Manufacturer and Baby Accessories: Twinkies & Binkies.
  – Contracted Conveyance.  Animal Skin Stuffing. 
  – Skin Doctor:  Taxidermatologist.
  – Armament Manufacturer.  Wrecker Service:  Missile Tows.
  – Farm Equipment, Bandages and Advice to the Lovelorn:  Deere Johnson & Johnson.
  – Internet Writing and Magic School: Blogwartz.
  – General Department Store and Rifle Range: Target Practice. 
  – Internet Shopping and Hair Supplies: Amazon.comb.
  – Appliances and Silicon Implants:  Breast Buy.
  – Linens and Extraordinary Deeds:  Bed Bath and Beyond Belief.
  – Computers and Shellfish:  Crab Apple.
  – Insurance and Shopping Centers: Mallstate.
  – Pharmaceuticals and Magician Supplies: Abbott Out of a Hat.
  – Dolls and Fast Food:  Barby’s.
  – On-line Store and Meat Products:
  – Environmentally Friendly Products and Computers:  Green Apple.
  – Beds and Computers:  Napple.
  – Wedding Venues and computers:  ChApple.
  – Autos and Puppets: Audi Doody.
  – Autos and Cowboy Dialects:  Audi Pardner.
  – Cars and Sand:  Saudi.
  – Chicken and Buffalo:  Tyson’s Bisons.
  – Skyscrapers and Ice Rinks:  Empire Skate Building.
  – Convenience Store and Casino:  7 Come 11.
  – Donuts and High-end Grocer:  Hole Foods.
  – Movies and Browsers:  20th Century Firefox.
  – Autos and Plays:  Alfa Romeo and Juliet.
  – Scalp Implants and Air Travel:  American Hairlines.
  – Three Wheel Vehicles, Home Goods and Surgery: Trikeatomy.
  – Home Goods and Outdoor Gear:  Hikea.
  – Computers and Transporters: IBMeUp.
  – Surfer Music and Autos: Help Me, Honda.
  – Condiments and Money Saving Deals:  Grey Groupon.
  – Accountants and Humorous Movies:  Ernst & Young Frankenstein.
  – Mints, Computers and Personal Trainers:  Delltoids.
  – Motor Bicycles and Plumbing Services:  Roto Scooter.
  – Computers and Autos:  IBMW.     
  – Bank Deposit Services for BP, Shell, etc:  Oil Wells Fargo.
  – Practical Jokes and Checking Accounts:  Prank of America.
  – Credit Cards and Artistic Endeavors:  American Express Yourself.
  – Diet Programs and Trash Hauling:  Waist Management.
  – Upscale Clothing and Self-esteem Counseling:  Prada Myself.
  – Bakery and Luxury Autos:  Sweet Rolls-Royce.
  – Telecom Services and Fairy Tales:  Sprints Charming.
  – Butcher and Body Shop:  Chop Shop.
  – Burger King and Dairy Queen:  Royal Foods.
  – Lawyer and Dog Groomer: Legal Beagle.
  – Tax Prep and Butcher:  H&R Chopping Block.
  – Expert Plumbing and News:  Roto Rueters.