Joke Contest — A First Date

Striking Out on a First Date.   Getting a first date and enjoying it are one of the challenges of life.   What are some things that might ruin your ability to get a first date, enjoy a first date, or get to a second date?

Here are some examples:

1. Things to not to say when trying to get a first date.
– How about dinner tomorrow night? Or are you going to play hard to get?

2. Things not to say on a first date.
– Will you want a boy or a girl first?

3. Things not to do on a first date.
– Bring a small glove and keep repeating “It it doesn’t fit you must

4. Places not to go on a first date.
– A funeral.

5. What to not too bring on a first date.
– Your Mother.

6. If you’re not enjoying a first date, how to be intentionally anoying.
– Take a Selfie every three minutes.

7. Things not to say after a first date.
– I can’t wait for our second date. We won’t be so limited on things
we can do.

8. Or any other faux pas a person could make related to a first date.
– I speak French. I’ll order the wine. Mr Wine Steward…voulez vous
coucher avec moi ce soir?

Write as many lines as you can. Then write ten more. Pick your best
three and submit by July 15, 2014. Send your top lines to You can send more than three
lines. The additional lines will be eligible for Honorable Mention. Our
panel of judges will recognize our top thee submissions.