Joke Contest Results — Sounds Like

It’s time for the results of our July joke contest.

The feedback from our readers was that it was one of our most difficult contests.

The theme of the contest was:  Sounds Like

New contests are announced on the first of the month.

Look for the next contest on August 1, 2015

Here are the top entries.

** FIRST PLACE **

The sound of my son’s set of drums falling over a cliff:  Bah dump bump.

Marty Bernstein, Oak Park, Illinios

** SECOND PLACE **

The sound of cashing my paycheck:  Clinkety clink.

Sandy Kampner, Evergreen Park, Illinois

** THIRD PLACE **

A costume malfunction on TV: Sounds like a million eyebrows raising in unison.

Gerald Fleishmann, Fountain Valley, California

HONORABLE MENTION (in random order)

Upon encountering a snake under my house…the sound I make exiting: Thump, thump, thump, thump.

My first expression upon falling into an open septic tank: Oh crap…

Siblings: Stop touching me! Poke, poke, poke.

Reporting from California, the sound of rain: Oops…forgot what it sounds like!

The sound after my wife’s big announcement:  You’re WHAT!

The sound of me after a weekend bender: I know I work around here somewhere.

Sound of my teen learning to drive: Screech screech screech BUMP.

The sound of going on the wagon: Glug, glug, as you pour your best booze down the drain.

The sound after hearing Honey I’m pregnant:  A pregnant pause.

The sound of mowing a lawn that hasn’t been mowed lately:  Where’s Fluffy?

Love at first sight. That sound you hear is common sense leaving your body.

As I get out of bed in the morning, my back snaps, crackles, and pops.  Sounds like what I’m having for breakfast.

The hushed buzzing sound in the air are all the secrets from people who promised they’d keep it a secret.

That rumbling sound underground is all our ancestors turning over in their graves.

The gymnast’s son checking out his dad’s bed. Sproing, sproing, sproing.

The silence sounds of a wise husband even though he is right.

The sound of my palm hitting my forehead when after ten minutes I finally find my sunglasses on top of my head: Thwack!

Huckabee trashing Jeb: Bushwhack.

Operating Sonar while playing a college drinking game: Ping-pong.

Shooting the hair that covers your forehead: Bang-bang.

American Pharoah declining to run at Saratoga:  Neigh.

Hillary taking the tough questions: The Sounds of Silence.

Hillary opposing the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP): Flip-flop.

Smoking pot while operating Sonar: Ping-bong.

The sound of my brain writing jokes: ha, ha ha, eh, ugh, oh no! hee hee, hahahahaha…yeah, that one!