Top Ten List

I miss David Letterman and his Top Ten Lists. If he were still making his nightly appearances, we would probably see something funnier than this:

Ten Things We’re Waiting for Trump to Say

“I didn’t say anything about John McCain. The creature on my head is a ventriloquist.”

“What I said was that McCain liked to serve greek sandwiches and that doesn’t make him a Gyro.”

“I called John McCain to tell him I was joking. He said that he prefers
jokes that weren’t shot down.”

“I may not have been in the military, but I have experience in combat.
Rosie scratched me with her fingernails and I pulled some of her hair
out.”

“I admit, I shot myself in he foot. I’m hoping that makes me a hero.
That was a joke. The hero part was just a joke.”

“I’d consider being a Vice Presidential nominee in 2016, if Palin doesn’t
take the slot.”

“I auditioned for Last Comic Standing. At the end of the pilot episode
the producer said: You’re Fired!”

“I had a humor writer on my staff. I’ve revised the job description to
include the word FUNNY.”

“My first choice for running mate would be Rosie…if only she’d kiss my
ring…which I carry in my back pocket.”

“I am the professional wrestler of politics.”

“They’re making a documentary about my campaign. Mission
Impossible…Trump for President. Should you accept this mission, your
party will self-destruct in 60 seconds.”