Joke Contest Results — The Big But

It’s time for the results of the August joke contest.

The theme of the contest is THE BIG BUT.

The challenge to the write is to write a line where the word BUT changes the meaning of the end of the sentence in a funny way.

Joke contests are announced on the first of the month.

The next joke contest will be announced tomorrow.

** FIRST PLACE **

She looked like a keeper, but needed a finder.
Cindy Tebo, St Louis, Missouri

** SECOND PLACE **

The restaurant sign said “all you can eat” but I had to stop after fifteen plates.
Sandy Kampner, Evergreen Park, Illinios

** THIRD PLACE **

The doctor is on time today, but he will see you as soon as possible.
David Novick, Dayton, Ohio

HONORABLE MENTION (in random order)

The Caesar Salad looked like a picture from a gourmet magazine, but
tasted like a magazine too.

Our plane arrived in Tokyo 8 hours late, but our luggage arrived right
on time, in Dublin.

I was going to write a comprehensive book of jokes but I found out that every joke has already been written.

I took a picture of my grandson’s giant Lego castle but he knocked it
down before I could post the photo on line.

I thought that my boss was giving me a thumbs up, but it wasn’t his
thumb.

The sign said Take One but I paid anyway in case someone was
watching.

The traffic light said Turn on Red but I waited because I just don’t trust
traffic lights.

My mechanic fixed my window washer but now the rest of the car
doesn’t work.

I couldn’t believe that I won the lottery but when I looked closely I
didn’t.

The realtor showed three houses to the young professional couple…but all three were within the couple’s price range.

The mechanic spent an hour working on the engine…but he said he made all of the necessary repairs.

He pleaded innocent to all of the charges…but he had a watertight alibi.

He said he only had a few drinks at the party…but he assured us that he would be OK to drive.

She followed her original plan of training for the marathon…but she is
sure she will be able to finish.

His account of the fishing trip was exaggerated…but at times he
stretched the truth

He said the tightness in his pitching arm was minimal…but he assured
the manager that he would be able to pitch tomorrow.

She thought she was a good driver but the grass had no lines.

She thought she was a good doctor but she needed patients.

The bus came in on time, but Sue missed it because it was always late.

A politician’s pre-election promise is a joke, but it takes a humourist to
execute it.

Yeah right is a double positive, but when spoken backflips to a negative, right?